The Wedding versus the Marriage

Personal

The marriage is more important than the wedding!

I know you have heard it over and over again from me! I will say it again…the marriage is way more important than the wedding!! I LOVE lOVE love weddings. From the 3 tired cake, to the broach bouquet, to the hanging lace dress, to the first dance. But all of it ends in one day! Once the wedding is over, the next day you are set to your honeymoon, and then in a week you are back home to real life.I don’t want to be a debby downer, but its real life and a true story. I have had multiple brides come to me after their wedding and say it happened so fast and now I want to plan another one! Haha I felt the same way.
The wedding is done, you’re sun burnt from the honeymoon, and real life starts. Happy Wednesday!!! LOL

The #1 thing you don’t want to happen is for you to get too comfy in your marriage. I am not afraid to say Rob and I had our ups and downs especially in the beginning! We did not get a long…at all!! Haha We both knew something had to change and other than putting our Lord and Savior first in our lives and our marriage, we knew we had to put each other second! We had to continue the sweet stuff, the fun date nights, the little stuff that means so much in the beginning!

1. Take date nights!!! Even if you have had a long week, take time to let it be just the 2 of you! This is so important! Time is everything and having time, just the two of you to talk about your day or your week over dinner, or going for a stroll in town hand in hand can help marriages more than you know!
2. DO the small stuff that made the other person love you so much! When Rob and I first started dating he would leave notes on the mirror for me. SO when I went into the bathroom I would see them. I loved seeing “you’re so beautiful”, or “I love you” taped to the mirror. It means he took time out of his busy day to think of me! Isnt that what its all about! Knowing the other person is thinking about you!
3. Read the 5 love languages book!!!! I believe this book is Crucial!!! It will tell you more about your husband/wife than you really know!! Find out what their love language is and use it to your advantage!!!! Try it, what do you have to lose!!! Rob and I try to read this book at least once a year, because I believe people change! When Rob and I first met mine was quality time, now it’s words of affirmation. Learn your partner!!! It is worth it!
4. Hang out with your friends!!! When Rob and I first met I was very clingy…yes I was that girl!!! Now, Im like go hang out with your friends, I need some alone time!!haha. And it’s true. It is detrimental to have your own time alone and your own space! Hang out with your friends, have a guys/girls night! Learn to be by yourself, without your spouse, be independent when you need to be! I am so glad I am not that girl anymore that depends on a man to make me happy! That was rough!! LOL
5. A house that prays together stays together!!! You all know Rob and I are huge in our faith! When we first met, we didnt go to church, well together! We didn’t make it a crucial part of our relationship. We put others first, we were not who we are today!!! When our marriage started failing we knew something had to change or it wasn’t going to work and I know a lot of marriages that have almost failed and then they found the Lord and everything was mended! I love hearing these stories because it is so true! As soon as we put God in the center of our relationship and our marriage we felt differently towards each other and its almost like our hearts mended, and yearned for the other. It is crazy how God works, as soon as you start to live for Him, he directs your path, and I know He has opened numerous doors both Rob and me!!!

Rob and I are here if anyone needs advice or someone to talk to. We have had numerous couples come to us and want to know how we do it. We have actually sat down with couples and helped them strategize what they need in their marriage. I become great friends with my brides and couples, building that trust with them is so important, and I want them to be able to come to me with anything! Marriage is hard and you have to work at it! Please stay inspired by one another and lift each other up! It does a world of good to your partner and your marriage! Below are some photos from the beginning to where we are now. It’s been a rocky road and thank you Jesus for getting us to where we are now! <3

Rob and I met on Match.com! SO blessed to have met this awesome man!! <3

What we do for the other person……Rob sold his truck to buy my engagement ring. I always told myself once we are out of debt I will buy him another Big Red! 🙂 In the very beginning dating, head over heels in love! Just as it should be!